conception of an idea

acrylic on three wrapped canvases

Inspired by someone I met about a year ago...
At first he fascinated me with his energy for life and dedication to work. He would wake up before dawn, work all day then run a couple miles all the way home. Then his unexpected wit and charm completely captivated me. I have never been engulfed by someone so charismatic before. It filled my mind with expectations and ideas. But great frustrations began to form because I was not the only one who felt this way. ...After a few painful conversations, I realized that what I was in awe of was my own idea and not him.

This got me thinking about how ideas are conceived by the mind. I become really fascinated by someone or something...I look more into it. Find its pulse ...Spend a lot of time learning about it until I'm completely captivated and it becomes apart of me. Fully integrated. The captivation spurs new ideas, connections and realizations in my mind that are all my own. It's a beautiful process.

He’s long absent from my life now, but I don’t feel that bothered by it. I loved him in theory, but there was only friendship in existence. Friendship in this instance is more than enough for me.